Wednesday, 9 July 2008

Music - James Blunt Lacking Muse

Fans of James Blunt have decided to be proactive in saving his career by trying to force his girlfriend to dump him.
Problems began when James Blunt released his much anticipated third album. His debut album - Back To Bedlam - sold an incredible 15 million copies and his follow up album - All the Lost Souls - has sold 8 million so far. His melancholic misery of pain and longing and lost love coupled with his warbled falsetto has really struck a chord, especially with unfulfilled women. He redefined bland. It was lift music for the heart. Fans expected more of the same.

Sadly, Blunt has been dating model Claudia Hemcovak and he's happy and contented. He's got several houses, lives in Ibiza and has an enormous pile of cash. This is fantastic for him, but his song writing has suffered somewhat. Rumours that he was off in a different musical direction came to the fore when the title of his third album was revealed - I Feel Bloody Great.



Track listings were a worry ahead of its release: Hello My lover, Higher, You're Stunning, No Mistakes This time, Much Wiserman, No Crying, Smiles & Sunshine, You're Mine - Wahey!, She Loves Me (Rah Rah Rah), 1999, Matching Pullovers, I Miss You The Most, Our Song, Will You Be My Wife and You Complete Me.

Number one fan, Sandra Smythe, has no doubts that James needs to be given a good old fashioned emotional beating from his girlfriend. "The sooner she sleeps with his best mate, humiliates him and then dumps him, or the other way around, the better it will be for everyone. He may be happy and loved-up, but he's got nothing to write about. We don't want to hear how marvellous life is. He made need a spell in Afghanistan to find his muse again. We want heartache, tears, unfulfilled dreams, abject misery and resignation to what will never be........(sob)

Even men have voiced concerns. "When I did the dirty or dumped a bird, I just gave her a James Blunt cd. She would have a good whinge, say how James understood her and even accept it was probably her fault as deep down I loved her. It was a crock of crap, of course, but it got me off the hook. This new stuff puts the Brotherhood of Man to shame," said one single man.

Fans have been in talks with Blunt and his girlfriend and a compromise has been reached. Blunt has agreed to a trial separation in order to pen some more classics. He'd written 'I Can't Go On Without You' even before he'd left the room.